memdump #03: in trademark fashion. | odditica

memdump #03: in trademark fashion.

You know, I’m starting to think some people may not have been all that stoked about Christmas this time around.

Down with the system decorations!

The other night, I was reminded of the amount of devilishly-crafted annoyance meticulously packed into the design standard for smoke detectors. I assume that the decision to make the thing beep every ten minutes when the battery starts running low is primarily motivated by the assumption that every single human puts their safety above everything else, all the time.

When you look at this from the perspective of a young adult living in the year 2022, however, this becomes an obvious design flaw, as our immediate desire to stay in bed clearly wipes the floor with what remains of our need to self-preserve.

Also, the fact that they still put 9V batteries in these things doesn’t help. You only get to figure this out when you least want to, too.

(initiate obligatory brag sequence)

I’m waking up at 5:45 now. Don’t know if that’s the reason for the sudden welcome suppression of my insomnia, but I’m not complaining. The ongoing weight loss and a bit of exercise here and there may be having an effect as well.

Apart from the oh-so ever-present desire to kill for something packed with carbs in it, I’m well.

(obligatory brag sequence complete)

I’ve decided to stay away from Twitter for a while (big website make small man sad), so I’ll have to do my part in delivering a portion of your daily hot take intake over here:

Vespertine is basically the perfect Björk album in every single aspect, and that’s absolutely, positively a fact. Yes, I will fight you – and no, it isn’t Homogenic (that’s the 2nd/3rd best, depending on how I feel about Post that day).

[insert essay about how Debut is underappreciated here]

Also, recall that whenever you leave Twitter, you have to tell like ten other people. I don’t make the rules, sorry.

Did you know that eating just a single peanut provides an amount of relief from peanut-craving comparable to the one you get from eating many at once? It’s true, and I can’t believe it either.

But respecting your kitchen scale also helps; those things are moreish. Peanuts, I mean.

Please do not eat kitchen scales, even if they’re keto.

It’s funny how I’m essentially talking to myself with these, but I guess that’s sort of the point. A bit silly and embarrassing, but then again, I think people need to do things like this for themselves more often.

There’s really no reason for any of this to make sense.

These stairs are pretty dope, and so will be my memories of them.

It’s good to be excited about stairs of the present too, though.

I am fully convinced that the passage of time is experienced differently by washing machines, as every time I actively observe the display, the data just doesn’t match up. My spreadsheets tell me computers won’t stop lying to us any time soon, and someone should look into it while they are still unaware of the fact that we know about the simulation.

‘Yeah, right. I bet this file will copy over to my Seagate in exactly 23 minutes and 10 seconds.’

(where have I seen this cat before?)

After months of struggling, I have finally managed to unblock my basin. I don’t think I have felt this much joy since Nichijou (minus the tears).

I’d probably register how sad it was if I weren’t so busy laughing about it hysterically, but hey, at least I’m living in the present.

You know something’s wrong when the statistically most reliable printer out there is ‘Save to PDF’.

‘Oh, are you trying to print some black text? That’s too bad, honey, because your 2016 HP16XZY22AEIOU is running low on blue ink again.’

You know it won’t stop telling you, just as well as you know that this isn’t a game you can win.

I wrote this one down, too.

There are parallels here I don’t want to think about.

Apologies for the inconsistency of my “colour grading”, by the way. I keep trying to hit the perfect arty-but-still-ordinary balance with the look, but it’s more of a hit-and-miss type of situation.

The dithering isn’t going away any time soon, though, just like my love-hate obsession with nostalgia.

Do you ever just run out of things to say in general?

I keep catching my carpet being all wavy whenever it thinks I’m not paying attention. Think it has something to do with the recycling bins being especially vibrant lately.

There’s something to appreciate about uncharacteristically good times on the metro.

Next round, my brain is getting beaten into submission.

Comments powered by Talkyard.